Fat Tuesday is really just that...week 37

Fat Tuesday. Another day people around the world over-indulge before 'some' people give up items and goodies for Lent. For those not giving anything up, the day is simply another excuse to not feel bad for gorging.

To me, Fat Tuesday is just like any other holiday; we excuse ourselves from healthy responsibility. We turn our backs on our 'diets' and allow ourselves to cheat. But how about looking at Fat Tuesday similarly to how many people approach a diet or new food regime? Have you ever decided to go on a diet or fitness kick, set a date, and then eat everything out of your house before you actually start? You tackle the ice cream, the gummi bears and chips thinking "one last feast before it's over." Why, oh why, do we have to 'break up' with our food habits by having one last go around? It makes just as much sense (i.e. none) to have one last rendezvous with a forbidden lover. What I'm getting at is-THE DAMAGE IS ALREADY DONE. One more time makes it that much more difficult to fight yourself out of the prison of your body. We need more control in our lives, right? Yet we cannot control what we eat?! It's ludicrous.

So what can we do? Before approaching a new fitness regime, etc. don't psyche yourself out before you even start.......is it really going to be the last time you eat a burger and fries? No. So don't act like it is and make sure you eat it before you start. Just start the journey and allow yourself some breathing room. You are not going to be perfect always and that's not a realistic goal. I say, dump the junk all at once instead of feasting on it 'to get it out of your house without wasting it.' Don't allow yourself to stock up an emergency stash. Take it all into the workplace or your friends and think nothing more of it. That way, when you do have it, it's a one time treat and not an indulgence.  

This week was not a huge week for me, but I will proudly & anxiously say that I did sign up for an all women's 1/2 marathon. My training officially starts the week of St. Patty's and I'm using this month to get focused, get regimented, and start to build that endurance back up.

So onto my weigh in:

Weight: 175.6 (ouch)

Body Fat %: 37.8 %

BMI: 28.8

Weeks til goal: 41

Ouch is all I can really say. I've GOT to get my cardio back up and I've got to stop eating more portions than I should. I want to hit 50 lbs weight loss sooner than later and I have a mental goal of getting somewhat bikini friendly by the summer.

Going back to Fat Tuesday and the 40 days of lent. Whether you are Christian or not,it wouldn't hurt for you to use these 40 days as a means of self-discovery. A lot of us out there are putting ourselves to the test so you'll have a lot more emphatic friends out there if you make a fitness goal for yourself for those days. Imagine the habits you could form in 40 days. Try making a promise to yourself to go for a long walk each day, no matter the weather. Enjoy and appreciate nature while you are at it. Think about the people who live in these conditions without the shelter of a home. Promise yourself to run a mile every day. You'd be surprised how one mile in a months time goes from "Holy shit, I can barely breathe" to "hmm, a mile? Maybe I can do more." I implore you to try something new for 40 days or to give up something that will make you more fit (i.e. sodas, cigarettes, beer, etc.). Give it a try. Let me know how it goes. Share with your friends so they can hold you accountable. You can do it.


Love w/ all my bum,
CH

p.s. A special shout out to my friend, Anna, who jumped on the treadmill this week. I couldn't be happier for you! Keep going rock star-we'll be doing a 5K together in NO TIME!

Weight loss should be my Valentine

Hey Bum Followers!

This week, we were all in the mood for some lovin. Crappy, chocolate-filled, heart shaped boxes floated around the office, cupcakes with conversation hearts pass us by in the hallway and brownies arrive at your desk. All I could think to myself this week was "damn, go for the plants & jewelry instead...they last longer and don't make you feel guilty afterwards." I must say, I was so appreciative of Neal for not getting me anything related to food.

Soapbox thought: I'm reminded of Easter with the 'traditional' Valentine's offerings. For the past few years, I have asked my husband as well as my family to only fill my Easter basket with healthy treats (granola clusters, fresh fruit, etc.). It is SO much easier to enjoy that gift...I wanted to share this idea with you for when you make your baskets & when special someone's make yours. Your kids will still believe in the Easter bunny if he brings healthy goodies-heck, we put carrots out for him, why would we expect jelly beans, peeps & a chocolate version of him in return?

My last post talked about my need to find motivation. I have been going to the gym halfheartedly and that makes for less productive workouts. My stamina has felt lackluster and this funk was not only making me weak mentally, but physically as well. I spent days wandering pinterest for motivational quotes, thought long and hard about the goals I have for the year and it still wasn't 'clicking' for me. So what was I supposed to do during this funk? I set a schedule this week for all the classes I was going to take. For me, nothing motivates me more than to have a gym community. I went to zumba...I mean, who doesn't feel good after shaking it like you are in the club without the nasty, drunk men groping you?! I went to my TNT training. My trainer, Adam, even noticed the change in me and kept saying I needed motivation in my eyes...it still didn't click. But after a week of classes, I felt a little better, but still off.

.................And then Wednesday happened...............

On Wednesday, I showed up at the gym and got on the treadmill. I chose the back row because I've been feeling dumpy lately and didn't feel like being self-conscious while everything jiggled about while I attempted to run my version of 'fast.' I look up and see a woman about my age. She was beautiful and for the first time in what seems like forever, I wasn't intimidated. I was jealous, but not in a snarky, bitchy way. I was actually in awe of her figure. Without sounding like I have a crush on her, I'll break down what I mean. She was not a petite girl by nature, but she had a petite physique. Most importantly, she was ripped. I don't know how, but she was ripped and toned but still feminine. I have never seen a woman look that way. Her arms, shoulders, legs, etc. all had definition. You could see her muscles without her flexing and yet she looked so womanly. No a steroid vein-showing, protein shake loving, weight-lifter body. I later found out she does compete but she didn't have  that orange glow and wrinkly face. She still had curves, but no bodacious ones. I've searched online for a body image to share that looked similar to her and have yet to find one. Google 'fit women' and I halfway thought I was looking at porn shots or the leathery, orange body-lifters...woof. And I'd be too much of a creeper to take a shot of her working out. LOL! How weird would that be?!

No thanks

And then it hit me. "I want to look like her" and then "I CAN look like her." I immediately emailed my trainer who knows the woman (I discovered her name is Rachel) and asked her what she does and what I can do to get that physique. He said it was very simple, I keep doing what I am doing and don't let up. I'm going to start making a log book of my meals for a few weeks so he can have his wife (a nutritionist) evaluate my regular diet. The best part is, he now has a mental bookmark in his brain for how I want to look. He sees my goal as his own. I went to the gym twice today to make up for my lack-luster workout previously. Both were with my TNT coach...he called me Rachel every time I started to slow down and it tapped right into my psyche that I need to push harder if I want to achieve this goal. It felt great to have someone on my side to push me to the limit in the gym. Now you all know how I feel about goals...I make them so it keeps me motivated and I make them attainable & measurable. You guys might be seeing a few more photos of me and my progress these next 6 months.

On another note, the half-marathon I've selected to do is the Zooma female-only half marathon in Annapolis, Maryland. The run is set for June 2nd and I will be registering this weekend at the kick-off expo on Saturday. I wouldn't be lying in saying that I'm scared shitless of this race but if I don't try, I will only regret not challenging myself. It's a large undertaking for me, but I believe I can do it. I have researched and found a 12 week training schedule for the race and it begins in March so I have a little bit of time to build up a little bit of cardio endurance.

Looking to next week, the weigh-ins reconvene. Yuck. But it must be done. I know I've had a set back, but I have confidence in my ability to bounce back, regain momentum, and keep hustling through my current goals and make new ones along the road to my target weight of 135 lbs. I am just glad I found my motivation again.

Love w/ all my bum,
CH

Ringing in 2012 without the bells, whistles & shenanigans

Greetings blog readers!

I left you in December with six month before and after shots. I wanted to end 2011 on a very inspirational and motivational note. Perhaps my words helped you make better decisions over the holidays? Either way, I took a month off of writing. Also, due to a pulled back muscle in the beginning of January, I had to take a couple weeks off from working out. I know, I know...excuses, right? Yep. I'm calling myself out here. Reader: I have failed you this month and it won't happen again. I promised honesty about the ups and downs of this journey and here is my first, and determined to be last, real mess up on my path. I wouldn't blame the holidays, I was actually quite good throughout them. But getting back into a routine upon our return was hectic. We had to replace all our pipes and then put hardwood flooring throughout the house. Money spending in abundance ALWAYS stresses me out and instead of using my new go-to of the gym, I excused myself from it, likely because my emotions and mind felt like I was lifting weights allllllllllllllllllll day. Although everything is looking spic and span...I am not. I 'allowed' myself to not hit the gym because I was doing so much 'work' at home. I know we've all been there....but really, one hour away from the house to be at the gym would not have killed me. One hour at the gym vs. 24 hours of being (and feeling) fat and lazy. Hmmmm, what wins???

While this break comes intense anxiety, guilt and an overall feeling of laziness, I was overall glad to have a break to see just how easy it is to fall back into this 'comfort zone' and how desperately difficult it is to pull yourself out of it. I recall my infamous 'should-ers' who think to themselves "I've wasted my breakfast, so I might as well go all out on a feeding frenzy for the rest of the day because the healthiness of the day is already shot" and I empathize the thought process. Yes, it's easy to fall back and I imagine it's that much more difficult to come back to the healthy path if you have no recent achievements to draw upon for motivation. For me, one look at my 'before' picture and I want to put gym clothes on or thinking back to my 15K and feeling a need to go out there and do a run. Summer will be here sooner than I realize and I'l be DAMNED if I don't look hot and fit for it.

Everyone comes up with New Year's resolutions that, to me, become synonymous with dreams unrealized, immeasurable, or too mighty to conquer without the correct mindset. It was hilarious to me to return to the gym to find it empty...it only took 2 weeks for those "I'm going to lose 15 lbs this year" resolutions to fall flat. For those that feel the need to have a fresh start...come up with a plan that is measurable and achievable. Don't just will away weight, grab a gym membership and then try to think of what you want to do while at the gym. Instead, make progress goals. I've done a list for myself so you can see what I mean:

Overall goal: I want to run a half-marathon this year
January: 
-Research half marathons during the year and pick one
-Register for it
-Sign up for 10-15Ks along the route towards the half to ensure motivation
-Research a training routine and begin it
-Start running a few miles at a time

Goal: Run 5 miles regularly during the week
February/March:
-take a few weeks running 3 miles at a time and increase to 4 and 5 over a two week period

March:
-maintain workouts even when in San Francisco for work

April:
-begin training for the half marathon


Making a plan & writing it down will not only help you map out the course to success on your goal but also motivate you to follow through with it. Now, in my head, I have the desire to run a full marathon and although it's great to shoot for the stars, I know it's not it my deck of cards right now. I will, however, visit the possibility for the latter portion of the year (depending on when I register for a half).

Most importantly, it does not have to be New Years to make a choice to change your routine or your life. I started my journey in June because for me, the timing was right and I had taken time to plot out what I wanted and how I wanted to achieve my goals. It's also perfectly normal for those goals to change and mold into something else along the way...as long as you are still working to achieve something, you can't go wrong.

Alrighty, so onto my weigh in for this week. After almost a month off, I was scared as hell to step on the scale. I thought it might read "DAMN GYRL?!" instead of numbers.

Here's my last weigh-in in December vs. today:

Weight December: 167.8

Percent of Body Fat: 35.6%

BMI: 27.6

Water Weight: 47%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 33

Weight Today: 173.4

Percent Body Fat: 37.4%

BMI: 28.5

Water Weight: 45.6%

Week til goal: 38

A slap on the wrist is warranted, but although I have failed in some capacity, this time off also allowed my body to rest and heal and I am very thankful for that. I was actually surprised that I hadn't gained more because I know what I put into my body the last 2 weeks. 5.6 lbs is looking pretty good considering that in June, a month off would have meant 10 lbs on top of my already obese situation. 

The weight gain is also an affirmation that what I am doing does, in fact, work because staying motivated and accountable is the best thing to help you stay on track. Another great feeling was getting 2 instances from readers asking where my weekly blogs were. THANK YOU. The whole point about this blog, aside from giving my tidbits, is to make myself accountable to YOU readers. It makes a difference to know you were 'looking' for my blog and was disappointed to see you haven't gotten it. My gratitude to you both.

Onto the next week, you will be hearing more from me and I plan to divulge more personals that led me to work out, enabled me to gain the weight originally, and much more. Stay tuned!

p.s. for anyone that wants a goal from me: I plan to go full exposure once I have reached 50 lbs weight loss. I will post on Facebook and start to market myself and my journey more. I plan to do this by starting on my personal facebook but am also considering starting a page just for Bum>Heart.

Love w/ all my bum,

CH

28 Weeks. Picture Day!

If pictures could say a thousand words, than my before pictures are screaming and begging for help. It actually saddens me to see how I truly let myself go. I thought that taking the updated pictures would not show that much of a difference. I mean, I still feel vulnerable taking them, I still am self-conscious about my weight, but good Lord am I in such a different place mentally and physically taking them. If my pictures today could speak, they would let out one huge hell of a sigh of relief. My bones are thanking me, my joints are squeaky clean, and my skin is trying to do me a favor and tighten up as much as possible. This week, although I did weigh myself, I am going to let the pictures speak for me about my weigh in. I think about the rough month on October, when I felt nothing was really changing. And then I look to the huge month I had in November, where my body finally caught up to the weight loss in a good way. I still feel a little awkward about people asking me about my progress, like a microscope is being put on various parts of my body, but then I realized, these people are asking ME for ADVICE on how to do it! WOW. I am now recommending to them to read my blog. :) The 1st question is always 'what's your diet' and my response is 'living a healthy lifestyle without dieting.' 

Anyways, there's my little tidbit...now onto the main event for the week...PICTURES (not w/ santa haha). And, as promised, sans makeup and sans sucking in!

Before:

6 months later (front):

Well, the front shots are definitely a slimmer version of me. I couldn't decide which picture showed best, so you get both.

Side shot before:

 6 months later (side):

Ok, in my opinion, this side shot shows the most progress. I actually want to cry when I look at the before shot, but truth hurts. And look how far I've come with that truth. Now my truth is so much better.

Back shot before: 

Back shot 6 months later:

Look at my arms-mucho bettero. And a few rolls are missing. I won't be missing those!

Overall, I am happy and pleased going into Christmas. I'll be snowboarding, hiking, and sledding over the holidays in the Rockies so I'm hoping to not gain anything over the break and at least stay where I'm currently at. Sound good? Yep!

Have a very Merry Christmas everyone. And please stay fit & stay healthy over the holidays. It's not worth the guilt afterwards!

Love w/ ALLLLL of my bum,

CH

p.s. weigh-in: what do you think of my 6 month pictures compared to my 1st day? What do you notice that I might not?

Week 27-Holidays are almost here

With the holidays just around the corner, I thought I'd use this post to talk about ways to trick yourself into not eating EVERY option placed before you at holiday parties. With all the smells and bells, it's probably the most difficult time of the year to not snack. On average, Americans gain 1-2 pounds over the holidays. The problem is that many people never work it off but simply add to their weight. Let's work on preventing that.

Alcohol: Limit yourself. Try drinking a glass of water before you consume any beverage and have another glass of water afterwards. This will make your stomach feel full faster as well as balance out the dehydration properties of alcohol. Also, try grabbing a glass of wine and enjoying the flavor by nursing it for awhile instead of taking shots or drinking fruity cocktails that taste so good, it's like drinking flavored water. 

Working out: Try to get in a workout a few hours before the party. That way, health is already on your mind and you will be less likely to blow the popsicle stand when you just spent all this effort trying to shed calories. Also, make a plan for your workout the next day in the morning. This will help aid in you not going to sleep too late and staying out later to drink.

Nibbles: You know I advocate bringing your own snacks and having that while others gorge on cheeseballs, fried finger foods, fudge, etc. I also advocate bringing a healthy option hor d'ouerve. With so many healthier options out there, make one less temptation for yourself and others by bringing something guilt-free. Trust me, people will honestly appreciate having a healthy choice. 

The meal: If your meal is buffet style, start 1st with veggies & salads. Make it almost uncomfortably tight for your mac & cheese to sneak it's way all over your tray. Limit yourself to one plate and allow yourself 2nds only in the healthy options. Try to sit far away form the buffet line and also try to sit with people you know are either picky eaters or working on a healthier lifestyle too. It helps when you aren't sitting next to people that go back for 3rds. If there is a kid's size plate-try that 1st. Planning on having dessert too? Eat slower and cut that pie slice at least in half. Trust me, you'll thank me later. Don't forget that just with the alcohol, drink as much water as possible in between food types and you'll feel fuller faster and will eat less. Served dinners are usually easy to monitor, so just take your time and you should be fine.

So onto the weigh-in this week:

Weight Day One: 207.8

Percent of Body Fat: 44.3%

BMI: 34.2

Water Weight: 40.6%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 73

Weight Today: 167.8

Percent of Body Fat: 35.6%

BMI: 27.6

Water Weight: 47%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 33

I gained a pound this week but I am actually ok with that. I busted my bum in the gym right after weighing in this morning and I felt like I pushed it extra hard so as to start this next week out better. As the holidays near, I am also going to try to get in as much extra gym time as possible so that I won't guilt myself on days that too many functions prevent me from getting in a run or gym.

And, as promised, a few shots of my facial weight loss progress!

June 2011

December 2011

Holy Crapola! Do you see how HUGE and PLUMPY my face was?! WHOA WHOA WHOA. It's crazy to see them next to each other. Well, there is progress if I ever saw it :) And look, I have chin curves as in, you can see my chin and it's bone structure. I seriously cannot believe I was such a jiggly-puff. It's one thing when you avoid mirrors and you get this 'vision' of how you think you look (it's all in perspective) but seeing the change point blank is eye opening. I'm so proud of how far I've come but I am also embarrassed that I let myself get like that to begin with. Ahh, how nice it is to say goodbye to that person I no longer recognize or identify with.


Feel free to post some before/after shots in the comments-or email them to me-I would LOVE to highlight you and your successes!!

Have a wonderful & healthy week!

Love w/ all my bum,
CH

1/2 a year later, the glass is half full. 6 months

Can you believe that it's been SIX whole months already?! Amazing. In six months I feel like I have endured and accomplished so much. I never would've guessed in June that by December I'd be running a 15K, will have gained warrior status and be 40ish pounds lighter. Incredible.

This week, I had to face the music that not everyone would be happy for me. I never thought that this transformation would affect anyone else in a negative way, but I guess they don't call it drama for no reason. Some of you may already know that my beloved running buddy and I (my neighbor of whom I have spoken about on here) have called it quits on one another. I finally had to break ties and depend on myself to accomplish my goals. I think this is for the best because now no one can pass my victories off as their own personal accomplishments. Aside from that, I no longer have to hear horrible, hurtful comments throughout this process from her.

For example:
1. "I can't run your pace anymore because it's too slow that it hurts my knees"
2. "Running with you always feels like an accomplishment to me because I know that you are struggling and I could do circles around you in the same run"
3. "You do not acknowledge the fact that I took time and effort out of my day to make you run harder, faster and longer. You wouldn't have been able to do it without me"

If you EVER EVER run across someone who will put doubt in your head about yourself while you are working towards something healthy and positive---RUN away as fast as you can. Although I am deeply hurt by these comments, they also give me fuel. This horrible experience has given me a great lesson about setting goals and doing them solo as well as helping me recognize that it's not just the "shoulder's" that can guilt you about being healthy. There will always be someone who will talk negatively about your progress-especially if they are not accomplishing anything on their end. This situation will be an overall healing process but I think any decent person will end up on the right side of things eventually. Overall, I am ready to come up for air with the clean break.

So onto the Hot Chocolate 15K. What an experience. I had the greatest support system yet at this run and I was pretty emotional while running the second half of the run.

My supporters decorated my home and car "Run like you stole something!" haha

I just couldn't believe I got up at 5 am and was running 9.3 miles. Cold weather, long waits, narrow path, etc. just didn't seem to matter as I ran because the bigger picture was that I had signed up for something I didn't personally believe I could do 2 months ago, trained for it and yet, there I was running it with ease.

Half way point

I think the best part was that I didn't feel tired while running and I barely felt sore. It was as if I was MEANT to be running it.

My bum running!

 I may not have been the fastest person there...but I laced up, showed up, and finished strong.

Emotional Finish!

The best part was finishing, the second best part was pacing an 11 minute mile the entire time. In my long distance runs while training, I never did better than a 12 min mile and some change. And yet, race day comes and I run a minute per mile faster?!

Heck yea, I did it!

And then we had some chocolate fondue!

Who wouldn't be excited about chocolate fondue afterwards?! But for the record, it's much better to run for beer!

WOW! Another cool thing was that I already feel ready to look to the next step: a whopping half marathon. That's some serious business. 13.1 miles my friends. I'm thinking late Spring, early Summer with a few smaller races in between to keep me focused.

And now for the main event. Drum roll please: Week 26 breakdown!

Weight 6 months ago
Weight Day One: 207.8

Percent of Body Fat: 44.3%

BMI: 34.2

Water Weight: 40.6%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 73

Weight Week 26: 166.8 (down 41 lbs)

Percent of Body Fat: 36.5% (down 7.8%)

BMI: 27.4 (down 6.8 pts)

Water Weight: 46.3% (up 1.3%)

Weeks to Meet Goal: 36

I've surpassed the big 4-0! This feels great! I am so happy for this next mini goal being reached. And for November's goal to lose 10 lbs. I was so very close to making it...but missed the mark by a pound. Pooey. Close enough for grenades in my book.

As I look to the next six months, it would be great to accomplish the half-marathon, be almost bikini ready, and feeling more full of energy and positivity than I have the first 6 months. Also I very much want my BMI in NORMAL range (under 25 points). As I look back on the past six months, it has been a rollercoaster of getting used to the newness in my life. I hope that my hubby will now climb on board the healthy lifestyle train along with me as that will make eating around the house that much easier. I also intend to cook more homemade meals and eat more veggies. 

On the road to success

Next week, I'll post some updated bikini pictures (woof) so you can see the difference over the past 3 months. I'll also show you a picture of me and my starting out pair of jeans. Speaking of jeans-I now fit in a size 10 (started at a tight 16) and I even have a pair of size 8 jeans that I can zip! Oh yea!

 

I sympathize with the hippo but cannot wait to NOT be a hippo anymore!

I cannot thank you all enough for offering me real support, being real friends, and being genuinely proud of my accomplishments. 

Here's to the next 6 months bum followers!

Love w/ all my bum

CH

Goodbye November and 25 @ 25 weeks

As 25 closed to an end, so did my age of 25. This week I not only celebrated Thanksgiving, but also celebrated my birthday. I was actually pretty decent in my eating habits over the events and felt great to not be amongst the average American who consumes 4,500 calories on Thanksgiving Day. It's difficult to imagine stuffing all that food down my throat and even more horrific to think that the average American DOES. Wow...this, my friends, is the society we live in. Fact.

Let's hop right into the weigh-in:

Weight Day One: 207.8

Percent of Body Fat: 44.3%

BMI: 34.2

Water Weight: 40.6%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 73

Weight Week 25: 170.6 (down 37.2 lbs)

Percent of Body Fat: 36.8% (down 7.5%)

BMI: 28 (down 6.2 pts)

Water Weight: 46.1% (up 1.1%)

Weeks to Meet Goal: 36

My overall analysis for a little bit of weight gain this week is taking a break from strength training for a week as well as having 4 days off from cardio. But, I will say that I am pumped in the sense that I did not eat terribly and have affirmation in that what I do to get fit works. 

Looking forward to my 26th year, it would be great to be in a place that has me fit in all aspects of my life. And there really is no better time than the present. After I complete the Hot Chocolate 15K this weekend, I'm likely going to start looking for a half-marathon to register for the late-spring/early summer. For those non-runners, a half-marathon is 13.1 miles while a full-marathon is 26.2 miles and pretty much everything else aside from Iron mans, triathlons, etc. is always a numbered K (for kilometers ran) like 5K, 8K, 10K, and 15K. It would be cool to do a destination run (maybe somewhere by the beach) but doing something around the DC monuments would also be a great experience. I think it's funny that I am already looking for the next distance goal-we'll see how I feel after this 15K! And I would be proud to say I ran a half...not everyone does that and it seems like there is a large step between 15K and 13.1 miles, even though it's 4ish miles more. I running circles and chat, I have felt like a non-runner because "anyone can train and do a 5K in a month" and "it only takes a little training to do a 15K." To the non-runner, that totally sounds like crap but for some reason, in a runner's world, a 9 miler is clearly a warm up. This is not to discount my achievement when I finish on Saturday, but it does give a glimpse of what it means to be a 'runner' and in most cases I have found the group to be somewhat snobby. "Oh yes, I did that half awhile ago and it was a decent run" -they say. Haha. If any sport could be pompous, I'd never say running would be my 1st pick, but it is slowly changing! I cannot help but feel there is always this looming judgement placed on you by your pace, tempo, overall time, and personal record (PR). Well, I'll tell you what-THAT part of running is not for me. But I do respect this hidden sense of competition between everyone. Say I ran 5 miles today, a runner would tell me they did a 6 miler on Tuesday. It's the land of one-uppers and it's a combination of frustration and amusement to 'get it.' And then I realized that dedicated runners do it solo. No one makes you pound the pavement across the finish line  at the end of the day except for yourself. You can run with groups, etc. to help motivate you but all in all-running is about the personal experience. This is such a foreign concept for me because I have always played team sports. In team sports, everything I did was to benefit the whole. My personal accomplishments were for everyone. Hit a grand slam and 4 people get home and your entire team gets points. Slam dunk-a great shot by me and 2 points on the board for my teammates. PR on a race and I feel great-no one else. This sport is a completely different mindset and learning it's jargon, etc. is interesting. This sport is also challenging in that it's truly the first sport I've ever had to work at to be good at. I thrived inn team sports back in the day and this new challenge is really motivating me to master it. The best part is is that over the course of the next year, I will get better and better...but eventually everyone in running hits their peak. For example, as time goes on, you don't take minutes off your run to where you started at 10 minute mile and over 10 years eventually get to a 1 minute mile. There is a ceiling for everyone and knowing that makes me feel less overwhelmed by this new community of 'snobby' runners. I can see a runner and know that no matter how hard they try, it's natural ability and talent that makes someone a star athlete. And that's where my most profound respect comes for runners: to know that after a certain point, you cannot do any better and yet they still go at it, still try, still run. That is incredible. 

Anyways, I cannot wait for my run this weekend as you can tell from my entire dialogue previously about the sport! I am blessed that this time around I will have some of the greatest support I have ever had from a group of people. 

As for next week-I'll let you all know how the race went (even though I could care less about my time but more about me doing the run without walking at all!). I'm also do for some picture updates so I'll either get those to you next week or the following. 

Love w/ all my bum,

CH