4 months-wow.

4 months have and gone and here I am still posting to this blog weekly and then some!

I don't want to quite reflect back on everything in this journey, but I can't help but think of how far along I have come. Obviously, my weight is not where I want it to be but 4 months ago I was over 200 lbs and now I am not. I think that in and of itself is a great thing.  A reader recently told me that I always shed a positive light on this blog and maybe it seems like I am not being 'real' enough. I guess that is part of me trying to make my heart bigger than my bum. I am generally a realist that is often perceived as being negative; I am working on seeing the sunshine and rainbows a little more frequently. And in reality, all this hard work and sweat and jiggling about makes me feel like I need one outlet where I can be positive about every little thing I accomplish-which is here in this blog. But this post will be more 'real' in the sense that rainbows won't overshadow my thoughts and feelings. 

I give myself a hard time and guilt myself when I have more wine than I should or eat something I know is bad, but let's face it. This sh*t is hard. No one is perfect and sometimes it really does feel like eating a bowl of ice cream is worth being fat for. There's a reason why people characterize heavy people as jolly and jovial...maybe it's because they are living how they see fit and not counting calories or worrying about the next mini-goal they are trying to reach. We often say these people need a reality check because their risk of disease and fatality from obesity is increasing exponentially. Frankly, it's easier to be lazy, easier to sit on the couch, easier to grab extra handfuls of treats. No one said this journey was going to be easy and if it was easy-more people would do it. I guess I am just now realizing how tough it truly is. Sometimes, it doesn't seem worth it when you work your bum off for fractions of a pound on the scale each week.

They don't say Jolly ol' Saint Nick for no reason!

Last month, I talked about how great it was for people to notice my change in weight. What I didn't realize is that from that point on, those people would become monitors of my progress. Bring out the microscope people, because now I am frequently asked how it's going and it tends to feel more like an interview and awkward than to be proud of what I've accomplished. I sometimes feel like saying "yep, I am still fat, but am not as obese as you remember-so please get that old vision of me out of your head-thanks!" When you work at a place like I do, any change is noticed and spoken about in cigarette breaks and cubical whispers-most often not in a positive nature. That added pressure sometimes seems unbearable. Talk to the people who aren't working out and your presence makes THEM feel bad/fat. Talk to the super fit crew and they put you in your place via their glowing accomplishments via triathlons, marathons and their already near perfect physiques and size 2 designer slacks. 

With that b*itching and complaining out, this week was a different kind of pay off. I went hiking in Cotoctin Mountain, Maryland, ran 4 miles without stopping, accomplished running 1 mile in 9.10 minutes (reminder: I started out near a 15 minute mile), and set a new goal of that Hot Chocolate 15K. 

I overall feel pretty good about that and even though I did not lose weight this week, (thank you Aunt Flo) I actually looked at myself naked today and did not feel ashamed. Remember a couple weeks ago I took pictures of myself again in that blue bikini? I could tell a few differences here and there but overall still felt dumpy. This morning as I got ready to weigh myself, I turned and faced my mirror and liked what I saw. I could bend at the waist and not see rolls to the left and right of my "underboob" and obliques, my back fat is slithering away and my stomach is getting tighter. My weight this week does not do my body justice. My body is taking form in the shape it should be. It's more about how you see yourself and how others see you than the number on the scale. And today, I feel like I've lost over 30 lbs. We all hit plateaus here and there and I don't think I necessarily hit one, but I do know that something is changing overall with my physique. I am hopeful that over the next few weeks that weight loss will catch up to my changing body...and then some :) 

On to this week's results:

Week 18

Weight: 180.2

Body fat: 38.4%

BMI: 29.6

Water weight: 44.9%

Weeks: 45

Week 1 Stats

Weight Day One: 207.8

Percent of Body Fat: 44.3%

BMI: 34.2

Water Weight: 40.6%

Caloric Intake Should Be: 2127 cal/day

Weeks to Meet Goal: 7

Although I am not as uppity as I generally am on Thursdays, I will be going out later to start the mission of finding a Marine Corps Ball dress w/ a gal pal. All of us in not-so-fit situations know that this can be a daunting experience; however, I will strive to make this celebratory as last year I refused to go because I knew I would not fit in the dress size I was accustomed to. Today, I am in that size so that will brighten my spirits and make me feel regal or sexy or whatever the dress I find conveys. So I'm off to get done up and look good-it's the best advice I can give for dress shopping. Look like a million bucks and you'll feel like a million bucks and the size of the dress won't matter-how great it looks on you does!

I look forward to sunnier days next week and rainbow posts for week 19!

Love with all my bum,

CH

Wake me up when September ends...week 17

This past week, we closed the chapter of September and it feels like I was in a coma that whole month because I woke up and it was already gone. Sa la vie September!

This week has been full of some awesome points:

1. mini-goal conquered: Warrior Dash
2. Ran a 9 . 22 minute mile
3. Cut 5 minutes from my 5K run in 3 weeks

Now that I have become a warrior, I needed to set a new ambitious goal for myself. Today, I registered for the Hot Chocolate 15K in D.C. and boy am I already nervous about that one!

I was distracted by the cute logo and the idea of chocolate before really letting it settle in that this is just over a 9 mile run. Mind you, I have been running a couple 5K distances a week, but 9 miles-wow. That will be the longest I've ever run for, get this, fun. Or ever for that matter. AND to boot, all runners have to be below a 15 minute pace in order to complete the race. I am not too worried about this, but who knows. It's another pressure point. Either way, I WILL finish it and I WILL get to enjoy hot cocoa and chocolate fondue stations afterwards. It defeats the purpose of burning 1,000 calories but what woman could resist?!

In addition to this news, I have 3 blog followers and one of their boyfriends also participating in the run so it looks like we'll have a mini-team the day of and I will have a network of friends to run with and support me in achieving this goal. I was out with two of my friends last night doing a run and let me tell you, they pushed me pretty hard (I was whimpering like a dog and panting like one too). But I am thankful for it. These two will be my core running mates and hopefully the other 2 will join for weekend runs here and there. And that, my friends, makes me excited.

Ok, so onto the weigh-in for the week:

Week 17:

Weight: 178.6

Percent of Body Fat: 39.2%

BMI: 29.3

Water Weight: 44.2%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 44 

From initial weigh-in:

Weight Day One: -29.2 lbs

Percent of Body Fat: -5.1%

BMI: -4.9 pts

Water Weight: +3.6%

Weeks to Meet Goal: -29 weeks (12 weeks ahead of schedule)

Ok y'all. I am THHHHHHHIIIIIIIISSSS close to 30 lbs! WOW. Pretty cool. And how about the fact that I want to share the progress and text everyone I know? Haha. I won't go shouting to the mountains yet, but when I hit that mini-milestone, a facebook post will be in order. I might have to sneak a weigh-in over the weekend to see if I did it as I'm not sure if I can wait until next Thursday to find out.

Overall, September was great to me and next week I'll be discussing making it 4 months into this lifestyle. Man, how time flies when you're getting fit.


Love w/ all my bum,
CH

Am I a Warrior?

Saturday, October 1st: I wake up extremely early because, let's face it, I had butterflies from the second we left the house on Friday to get our hotel near the Warrior Dash (located in one of the oldest cities in the USA and the home of the 1st families of Virginia). I put my running attire and war paint on and we headed to Berkeley Plantation, the sight of Virginia's 2011 Warrior Dash. Being somewhat of a history junkie, I feel compelled to share with you the importance of this location from it's historical standpoint. Among the many American "firsts" that occurred at Berkeley Plantation are:

• The first official Thanksgiving: 4 December 1619
• The first bourbon whiskey distilled: 1621, by George Thorpe, an Episcopal priest.[4]
• First time Army bugle call "Taps" played: July 1862, by bugler Oliver W. Norton; the melody was written at Harrison's Landing on the plantation by then General, Daniel Butterfield.
• The first Warrior Dash of C.H., 1 October 2011

Pretty amazing, right? And who woulda thunk it? As we crossed over the James river and into the plantation grounds, you get the feeling that so much has happened here and we are merely walking amongst the ghosts of the past to forage new grounds and memories for the future. I may have been attempting to become a warrior that day, but real soldiers fought and earned that title in the bloodshed that happened here in 1622. Also the birthplace to a "Declaration of Independence" signor, home to President Harrison, and frequented by Lincoln during the Civil War, I felt that greatness was achieved at this place. So all of this set the stage as I got my registration packet and secured my timing chip to my shoe laces and was fresh on my mind.

Just before the race

As in most battles, there has to be a cry to conquer and this was the same for my own personal goal. As the MC for the event called out "FINISH STRONG" all Warrior competitors retorted "BRING IT ON!" The fire blazed and we began our journey. 

As I ran, all I could think of was that I was finally doing this. I set out months ago to accomplish this and here I was, actually doing it. I was already proud of myself the second I started. I knew the timing wouldn't matter or the pace I was setting. All I knew was that no matter what, I was going to do every obstacle and I was not going to stop for one second, or even consider walking part of it. I may have been the tortoise, but I delighted in seeing some people who had whizzed past me in the beginning burn out half way through as I stomped past them later in the dash. And these are the obstacles I conquered in the order they faced me:

1. Barricade Breakdown: hurdle over chest high wood and under barbed wire

2. Rubber Ricochet: Run through floating tires that can knock you on your feet if you don’t maneuver fast enough (fortunately, my ninja skills enabled me to pass this part scotch free)

3. Road Rage: Imagine jumping through tires football training style and then climbing atop broke down vehicles in this maze

4. Chaotic Crossover: A tangled web of ropes of which are 10 feet off the ground that you crawl parallel to the earth over. 

5. Deadweight Drifter: Chest deep in a small river that flows to the James River whilst attempting to hurdle over gigantic logs. It was a team effort here and I lost my shorts a few times (secretly wishing I had a smiley face tattoo on it to make the view worthwhile)!

6. Teetering Traverse:  Like a high beam, you had only the width of your foot to keep stable as you walk up, across and then down a teeter-tottering wooden device. 

7. Deadman’s Drop: Exactly as it sounds and definitely the most difficult obstacle on the course. You had to climb up a larger than life ladder, get yourself over an inverted plank, and then drop 5 feet, catch yourself on a piece of wood and then slide the rest of the 15 feet down. I was a bit scared with this one and sliding down that plywood gave me bruises you wouldn’t believe!

8. Great Warrior Wall: To test the warrior strength, this second hardest obstacle was a barricade of wood with inches to climb up and rope only at the top to help pull you up and over. WOOF!

9. Rio Run: Running as fast as you can through muddy, waist deep water = difficult and time consuming, but manageable 

10. Cargo Climb: depicted here

11. Warrior Roast: through the flames I went

12. Muddy Mayhem:  Barbed wire and mud. I felt like I was low-crawling in a Full Metal Jacket remake!

13.   The Finish Line:

Finish Strong? Bring it on!

As I passed the finish line, a wave of relief, adrenaline and emotion came over me. Here I was this past summer, an obese and gross feeling person. 3+ months later, I ran 3 . 56 miles and 12 obstacles that I know many would have trouble with. Do you ever feel good knowing you can do something and others can't? In a weird way, I relished the thought that day. Anyone can get the gumption to stop complaining, "should'ing" and self loathing, get off their keister and start changing their life, but for me, this run personified me actually making that change and doing something about it.  

Feeling great (and teary-eyed) about the mini-goal accomplishment

The adrenaline made me want to jump back in line and do it all over again. But good times were calling me with the support of my husband and blog follower/great friend, Anna & her husband *photo credits given to her for the event*

The day had started out a with light rain, chills and nervousness, but it ended with sun rays and blue skies and heat. I believe that's exactly how the day went for me. 

And for those who care about my finish time:

In my age group, I finished in the top 50%, almost in the top 30%. Overall, I finished at #960 out of 3,020 people (definite top 30 percentile overall). I think this is fantastic. I have been running 3.2 miles around the 42-45 min range and gave myself an hourish to add on the obstacles. I am happy to report that I added a quarter of a mile to my standard run and added in 12 obstacles and completed the course in 55:01 minutes. That is totally kick ass!

So, am I a warrior? You're DAMNED RIGHT I AM!

Love w/ all my bum,

CH

Week 16 update

Last week, I was a total goober and did not blog. I did, however, gain 2 lbs that week so maybe that minor humiliation planted a seed into my head not to blog. Ha! In actuality, I was on a mini vacation to Cedar Point amusement park in Ohio. And boy did I work up a HUGE appetite there from all the walking between 11am and 1am. WOW! I was certain this week I was going to gain weight. Thankfully, I did not and I lost not only those extra two pounds, but an additional 2. My suggestions for long weekends is to pack healthy snacks for the road, drink plenty of water and do not eat fast food along the way! On top of all the walking I did at the park, I got up early one morning and went for a brisk run. It wasn't much and I didn't push myself incredibly hard, but it is far better than doing nothing. It also set the tone for my day in that I began it healthy, so I don't want to ruin it with funnel cake and corn dogs. All in all, I'd say I had a fantastic week and was a lucky gal. 

Incredible views of Lake Erie atop the world's mecca for coaster junkies

So let's go ahead and get to the numbers for this week:

Week 16 results

Weight week 16: 180.6

Percent of Body Fat: 39.4%

BMI: 29.7

Water Weight: 44.2%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 46

Initial Comparison

Total weight loss: -27.2 lbs

Percent of Body Fat loss: -4.9%

BMI points lost: -4.5 pts

Water Weight: +3.6%

Weeks left: -27 weeks

Like I said, not too shabby. There have been a few weeks where nothing has progressed, but then again, weight or not, my body is changing and being able to fit into things I haven't wore in years so that is a bonus! Besides, it's not always about the number, but the way you feel in your skin-right? It looks like I'm very close to losing 30 lbs and that, my friends, will be such a great day for me. And I'll be just shy of my half way point. I believe I mentioned in earlier posts that I am hoping to shed 10 more pounds for that Marine Corps ball so I need a motivation boost and to get on myself that much more. Wish me luck!

Looking forward, this Saturday, I will be doing my Warrior Dash. Training and completing this race was one of my mini-goals along the route of being healthy forever, and while I am nervous about the actual race, I couldn't be more excited that I have come this far in my workout routine that the week is here. 16 weeks people, I think I am well on my way to concreting this lifestyle change. 

Hopefully, I'll be joining this guy in the ranks of warriors, but I promise to let you all know how it goes after the run with hopefully some bad assery pictures to share of me from the event!

May the mud, sweat and beer be my treasure!

Love w/ all my bum,

CH

Week 14 Showcase Showdown!

Carissa, you have been selected to participate in the Price is Right! Come on down...and weigh yourself! Rut ro. Here I am again facing that silver scale, naked. Every week feels like I'm exposing some vulnerability to that device and every week it taunts me to dare step on it and not have lost weight. Have I ever felt so accountable to an electronic before? No. And yet, here we duel every week and the showcase showdown begins. Will I land on the dollar bill goal and win $1,000 or will I go over and lose all chances for the final showcase, or will I go under and have the small victory and chance to go at it again next week?

Bob Barker is now the name of my scale!

 That's basically how I feel every Thursday morning in my bathroom. Another shot to hit the mark. Another bet on myself, hoping and praying that I didn't lose against the house. 

I'll always bet on myself-win or lose

Every week I call into question my habits for the week. Did I fail in any way? Did I sneak an extra bite when I was full? Did I succumb to those office temptations? This week, I can say-yes, I nibbled here and there. BUT-did I make up for it with cardio and weight training? YES! With that said, here are the results of week 14:

Week 14:

Weight: 182

Percent of Body Fat: 39.8%

BMI: 29.9

Water Weight: 43.9%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 47

Initial Weigh-in Comparison:

Weight Day One: -25.8 lbs

Percent of Body Fat:  -4.5%

BMI: -4.3

Water Weight:  +3.3%

Weeks to Meet Goal:  -26 weeks (12 weeks ahead of schedule)

Two things to note: 

1. I AM NO LONGER OBESE! Holy crapola! Did I ever think today was going to be that day? Heck no because last week I gained 2 lbs. but oh how it feels so magical to not be in the danger zone. This is a huge step for me because I have really made a healthy change in my life. It's this sigh of relief that actually gets me excited.

2. I lost 4 lbs this week. Ahh, this is great because it's the most I've dropped in a week and it makes up for the fact that I gained 2 lbs last week. I am back and on track my friends. Woot woot!

As promised, pictures of my progress are in this blog. Again, no make-up, just me. And I am in the same bathing suit as before so there's an equal assessment. Don't you just hate how commercials for diets pills, Jenny Craig, etc. show this hefty person in hefty clothes and then the next image is well tailored outfit, hair done, makeup, etc? Shouldn't the results be enough? And let's face it, many of the before and after shots are of different people w/ similar features. You tell me if you notice any changes in my size/shape (it's hard to look at yourself without critiquing and seeing how much farther you have to go before sexy is officially back).

1st Original Before Pic:

 

Now:

2nd Original Before Photo:

 

Now:

3rd Original Before Photo:

 

Now:

4th Original Before Photo:

 

Now:

I hope y'all enjoyed these pics MUCH better than I do taking/looking at them. I cannot wait to have those final "after" shots done! I guess the main point is that overall, I do feel better, even if I mentally psyche myself out and give myself the guilt-trip every Thursday. On some of the photos, I see definite change (face shot, side shot), whereas in other photos I still see this yuck-o figure. But-I know I am healthier, and that's the goal overall.

Love w/ all my bum,

CH

3 months!

It's been three months and I am in the groove of things. I have already had some goals reached and have many more to go. I have failed in some ways, and flourished in others. All in all, I think I have succeeded so far in what I have set out to do...make my bum smaller!

This week comes in without the BANG! and POW! I was hoping (i.e. more weight loss), but it is a celebration of changing some of my habits and replacing them with healthier ones. So let's jump right into my week 14 results comparing to that horrific initial weigh in:

Weight Day One: 207.8 vs today: 187.6 (20.2 lbs lost)

Percent of Body Fat: 44.3% vs today: 39.9% (-4.4% body fat loss)

BMI: 34.2 vs today: 30.8 (-3.4 pts)

Water Weight: 40.6% vs today: 43.8%

Weeks to Meet Goal: 73 vs today: 53 weeks

I admit that I wish there were more dramatic changes occurring, but I also look forward to remembering these difficult times and being proud of pushing through it instead of letting me become a "should"er and excuse myself. I have made many errors throughout these 3 months of missing extra days of workouts and eating worse than I should from time to time, but overall these changes have also led me to lose twenty lbs and even more importantly, stop me from gaining additional weight this summer. Had I not made any changes to my life, I guarantee that I would have gained at least another 10 lbs over the summer and I would've been 217 lbs by now. 

When I reach mini-goals or timeline goals, I usually reward myself. I usually do this by getting another workout item. But I think that perhaps I was raised to overly praise myself when things are good, and shrug it off when things aren't as good as expected. 

That comic says it all. If you reward yourself too much, then what's the point? Rewards are about big goals being reached, etc. This month, I will not reward myself w/ a goody. I will reward myself with more determination in my cause. I have my Warrior Dash to train for and I'm going to need every ounce of energy put towards getting my endurance and distance running up. My goal for September is to get prepared for the Oct. 1st run. In October, my goal is to keep up that level of training and utilize that umpf to continue pushing myself into a tinier waistline for the Marine Corps Ball mid-November. My reward will be shopping for the perfect dress to bring a mini-sexy back. I know I will not be at my target weight by November, but I sure as shoot better be around the half way mark! I'm hoping to have lost 10-15 lbs by then putting me around 172. I want to get there and I would be almost right on the mark of half way! Just thinking of that, and doing it in 2 months makes my insides tingle with excitement.

My workout buddy, Stephanie, suggested that it might be time for some more bikini pictures to show you all the progress my body has been making, not just the numbers. Even though I cannot bare the thought of putting on another bikini for exposure sake, stay tuned for those. They couldn't possibly be worse than the "Goals or Ghouls" post! 

Thanks for your continued support Bum followers.

Love w/ all my bum,

CH

End of Bikini Season & Summer-Whew!

Whew, August, you sure gave me a run for my money. This month came with so many ups and downs I don't even know where to begin! First, let's say goodbye to August-it's been real!

Ok, now that we've broken up w/ August, we can talk about her now, right?! This month, I hit mile stones that I am pretty proud of:

1. I reached a mini goal to lose 20 lbs

2. I ran 6k

3. People are beginning to notice the change in my weight

I should be celebrating and on cloud 9, correct? Incorrect. This month was particularly trying on my nerves and emotions, and therefore played into my workouts and eating habits. First, let me break down the month of 'happenings:'

1. Got a ticket for my car's loud exhaust

2. Got another ticket for my car's dark tint

3. Hit my head on my car door and now it looks like I have a 3rd eye growing-and not in a wisdom, Oracle or Buddha kind of way

4. Got my car towed @ the gym for parking in a non-parking, parking spot that I've used for 3 years

5. My husband and I will not be going on our vacation cruise because duty called

6. Neal left for training for 3 weeks and will therefore miss our 1 year anniversary

What happened to things coming and three's and then stopping?! I tried to remain positive, but something you just need to feel sorry for yourself and have that be ok. 

I was feeling pretty good about the weight loss and people noticing and of course, you can't help but want to reward yourself for a job well done. Since starting this, I have rewarded myself with workout apparel here and there. But throw in some emotional sadness and, well, you tend to reward yourself in other ways-like food. As you will note in my week 13 results, my emotional not caring about food led me to not lose any weight this week, but instead almost gain a pound. couple the emotions with premenstrual hunger and you get these results:

Week 13 results (I'm beginning to believe 13 is an unlucky number!):

Weight: 186.4

Body fat %: 40.3

Water %: 43.5%

BMI: 30.6

Weeks til goal: 51

Comparison to Initial Weigh-In

Weight Day One: -21.2 lbs (+.4 lbs) BOOO

Percent of Body Fat: -4.3 (more than last week) YAY!

BMI: -3.6

Water Weight: +1.3%

Weeks to Meet Goal: -22 (10 weeks ahead of schedule)

So after this hem and hawing, it's easy for me to lose motivation. 

"Today I Don't Feel Like Doing Anything....I Just Want To Lay in My Bed"-The Lazy Song, Bruno Mars

But then, the silver lining appears to me this morning. Sure, I gained .6 of a lb, but I DID lose body fat. Isn't that what it's really all about? More muscle, less fat! There is hope. And although Neal is gone for a bit, I get to more closely monitor my eating because feeding your husband a half sandwich and a cup of soup for dinner can be bad news for him, but perfectly acceptable and satiating for you. AND, I must admit that I was nervous about going on the cruise and gaining a bunch of weight and although I made my goal for that trip to simply not gain or lose anything, now I have an entire week more to sticking with the program and making up for my emotional eating this past week. 

We say goodbye to bikinis this week (thank you!) and we start rushing into the fall briskness and activities. I am personally looking forward to doing runs outside when it cools down just a little bit. This weekend, I will say goodbye to summer by camping in Pennsylvania with my parents and younger siblings. It should be a great distraction from August's activities and my hubby being gone, and I'll be able to get in some great outdoor exercise that I am excited about. I say this weekend outdoors will be much better than eating and drinking and partying with friends...or sitting at home wallowing. :)

Goodbye bikinis in 2011-I can't wait to have one of you suckers on when I have brought sexy back in 2012!

Love w/ all my bum,

CH